A Call to Be Intentional

A.W. Tozer once declared that “what I believe about God is the most important thing about me.” I’ve spent the last two decades focused on calling grandparents to be intentional about what they believe about who God is, and how that shapes the way we live and think. It also impact the intentionality we have about passing the truth to another generation—who God is, what He has done, and what he says is true. If I can’t answer those questions myself, what do I have to offer the next generation that matters? This requires some intentional soul-searching about what I really believe because that will define how I live.

I have also come to understand that intentionally passing the faith to another generation is not reserved for grandparents and their own biological grandchildren. There is also a larger spiritual family—the family of God—with whom the older generation ought to be more intentional disciple-makers. We, who are older, have been given a grand privilege of being spiritual grandparents to boys, girls, young men and young women in our faith community. The sad reality is that few in our generation give it much thought.

So, I challenge every “elder” adult to reassess their perspective on the responsibility and privilege you have been given scripturally to engage with the younger generations and ask God what He would have you do. Christ did instruct His disciples, of whom all of us who know Christ are included, to go and make disciples of all nations (peoples). There is no age limit or restriction attached to that command. We are simply to obey because we know the glorious joy of being a child of God ourselves.

So, here are five things I want to challenge you to consider in this realm of intentionality with those in our community who are younger:

1. Get over the barrier that younger generations don’t want to hear what you have to say. If you are preachy and judgmental, always criticizing the attitudes and actions of the younger generation, of course they won’t want to hear you have to say. They need to know you care about them and want to know them. When trust and respect characterize your relationships with those who are younger, they will want to hear your stories and your views. Which brings me to the next point…
2. Listen well and create opportunities to talk about life in their world. If you’re willing to be a listener, you will have a good chance of building a relationship of trust. If you are trusted, they are much more likely to want to hear what you have to say when it’s time to say something. Learn to ask questions and then pay attention to what they answer.
3. Be excited about your relationship with Christ and what is true. Nothing so turns off the younger generations than hypocrisy. It’s not enough to say you believe something to be true. Your walk and your talk must line up. Exude joy and excitement in living it out your faith in all of life. Christ must be more than one of several heroes in your life. He must be Lord—and if you are excited about His Lordship, they are more likely to be as well.
4. Don’t hide your imperfections, and make sure your marriage is healthy. Be real about your flaws, but let them see you working hard to make your walk with Christ conform to His righteousness in all you do, including your marriage. Let them see what it means to love well. Nothing will counter the lies about marriage and family more powerfully than the living example of a good marriage that sees our imperfections as an opportunity to grow more fully into maturity in Christ.
5. Be willing to step outside your comfort zone without calling attention to it. Humility is about putting the interest of others above your own. That often requires doing things that are not comfortable or convenient for me. If I want to connect with another generation, I don’t do that by becoming their BFF (Best Friends Forever, in case you didn’t know), but by engaging with their world as best you can and being willing to sacrifice your own comfort to do so. It is not comfortable for me to lead a group of middle school boys, nor is it physically possible for me to do all the things they do at that age. However, being with them and taking an interest in them matters.

 
What will intentionality look like for you? I can’t answer that, but God can if you’re willing to ask Him. The command is clear… none of us are absolved from telling the next generations the praiseworthy deeds of God, His power and the wonders He has done (Psalm 78:4). I want to challenge you to join me in declaring with the psalmist, “even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, O God, till I declare your power to the next generation, your might to all who are to come” (Psalm 71:18). That requires being intentional. 

[In the comment section below, share ways you are being intentional about engaging the younger generations outside your own family.]

Rachel Project Matching Gift Challenge

The Rachel Project is a specific effort of ElderQuest Ministries to raise awareness among churches and pastors about the growing reality of grandparents who are suddenly thrust into the role of parenting their own grandchildren. It is difficult for most of us to understand the magnitude of this new reality in the lives of grandparents who will never get to enjoy the role of simply being a grandparent.

Because of struggles with guilt and shame (usually unfounded), many of these families remain invisible and overlooked in our churches. This is a tragedy that we cannot sit by and allow to happen. These families need to know they are a valued part of the family of God and the church ought to be place they are supported and welcomed. The isolation they normally feel can be overcome when the Body of Christ remembers that every part of the body is vital and valued. The Rachel Project is our effort to help churches learn who these families are and how to serve them well.

A key component of this effort is a video we are putting together that can be given to church leaders across the country. This video project tells the story of Rachel and her family, and provides resources and ideas for engaging these families locally. The filming project, distribution, and some printed resources we want to put into the hands of pastors/church leaders will cost about $15,000. A donor has already offered matching gift pledge $7500, and we currently have close to $2500 already pledged toward that matching gift. We need at least $5000 more in pledges to finish the project. Will you prayerfully consider making a contribution toward this matching gift so we can quickly get this tool into the hands of churches? Click the DONATE button below to contributed to the Rachel Project.